I was in third grade (1998-1999) when my parish pastor was removed by the Archdiocese for sexually abusing teens at previous parish assignments (he wasn’t accused by anyone at our own parish). Being a third grader I wasn’t aware of what was happening; however, I vividly remember my parents coming home at night after a meeting at the parish and my mom was balling her eyes out. When I asked my dad why mom was crying, he told me that our beloved pastor was leaving. I really liked our pastor and so I became sad that he was leaving, too. Three years later, our associate pastor is removed for the same reasons. This time it was a little different because I was a bit older (6th grade) and I didn’t want to believe the news was true. Two priests in my home parish were removed while I was a young student for sexually abusing children…that’s a lot of pain and emotional trauma for a parish community, especially one with a school.
When the associate pastor was removed, I remember the following Sunday our parish pastor (who was also the associate when our previous pastor was removed) preached about how embarrassed he is to wear his roman collar in public and how angry he is at his brother priests for the crimes they committed. I don’t remember his whole homily; but, I do remember how angry and emotional he was and I remember my mom crying next to me in our pew. I was in 6th grade.
Growing up in my parish I was introduced to about eight priests who had been assigned throughout my childhood and teenage years. Two of those eight committed terrible crimes and both left the priesthood after their victims courageously came forward. With the exception of those two bad priests, my parish was very fortunate to have six amazing priests who loved their people and served us well. They were not men who were seeking praise, honor, or power; rather, they were men of service who put others needs way ahead of their own. It was the witness of these servant leaders that inspired my own vocation to the priesthood. The reason they made the priesthood look attractive to me from a young age is because they showed how priests are humans and not some “superhuman” who is better than everyone else. I think it’s because of their witness to the priesthood that I didn’t blame the Church or the priesthood in general for the crimes of those two men. I just blamed them for doing something wrong and hoped that justice was brought to them as child abusers and that their victims found healing.
All of this is very different from what is being brought to the light in the recent grand jury in PA. Yes, we are hearing more horror stories of what wolves dressed in sheeps clothing (MT 7:15) committed to vulnerable children. These stories are extremely difficult to read and stomach through. I honestly can’t believe most of what I’m reading…how can another human being do some of the things listed in the report and to children no less! It’s horrific! We are re-living the dark days of 2002 in the American Church when the Boston Globe kickstarted the Church wide investigation of priest abusers. In the Archdiocese of Chicago, we were (as usual) ahead of the nation and had our own scandal breakout in the early 1990’s and then again in 2002.
All that being said, this time something different happened. This grand jury report, while explaining the horrible crimes of priests, is more focused on the Bishops and their coverup of the whole thing. These men who are supposed to be our chief shepherds knew about the wolves dressed as sheep and too many of the Bishops never called out the wolf for what he is. Instead, they let the wolves kill the sheep. This infuriates me even more. Many of the Bishops will stand behind letters from doctors, psychiatrists, they will say the culture “back then” was different, many people blame homosexuality, and the list of excuses goes on and on. I’m calling BS on all of it. An adult sexually abused a minor. They should be punished. Not hidden, not slapped on the wrist, not studied like they’re a science experiment…they should be punished and not allowed around minors for an extended amount of time; however, I would prefer they never be around minors ever again.
Bishops who knew about these criminals in the priesthood should have punished them. They didn’t. Now, the Bishops are trying to justify their actions and scapegoat their way out of it. WE CAN’T LET THEM DO THAT! Here is my prediction of what the USCCB will do: they will abuse and blame former cardinal McCarrick for being a terrible man and make him out to be public enemy #1; the Bishops will then write a document about their own need for accountability and stress how sad they are; the Vatican will send someone over to investigate and will probably issue a letter/document saying that the Bishops did some things wrong but now they’re working on it; finally, Pope Francis will probably write something about how priests and bishops abuse their power and that’s wrong. It will all be a waste of time and will accomplish nothing…no real changes will be made…Bishops will continue to act like mob bosses…the Church will continue to suffer.
So, what can we do? Honestly…we can’t do anything. I’m not saying this to be cliché and certainly not to be annoying; but, all we can do is pray, fast, and give alms. Yes, we need to be living the season of Lent. Only almighty God has true power and authority over His Church and only He can separate the sheep from the goats. We, as the Body of Christ, need to pray for the terrible priests and bishops to either leave the sacred office they hold or for God to call them home early so that the men who cherish and live their priesthood as Christ will be our Sacramental leaders. We also need to pray for the laity, that they will be courageous and live their baptismal priesthood to the fullest extent possible. We need to fast and offer up our fasting for all those who are hurting: victims of sexual abuse by clergy, clergy who are abused by bishops, lay people who are abused by their clergy, clergy who are abused by their people, bishops who are abused by other bishops, and the list goes on. By taking up the Cross with Jesus in our own fasting, we can begin to redeem the hurt felt by all victims across the Church and world. Almsgiving is necessary because it’s a great act of humility to give something that belongs to us away for someone else. We work hard for the money we make and deserve that money to provide for our necessities and the things in life we enjoy. This is why it takes great humility to discern the different between what I need versus what I want and then to give away the money we could use on what we want. Most people think of money when it comes to almsgiving and while that’s a great asset to give away it’s not the only one, we can also give away our time and talents. Friends, the more we humble ourselves then we will be able to get off our ivory towers and see the reality of life more clearly and be much more sympathetic, empathetic, and compassionate. The goal here is to stay away from the evil of scapegoating and pretending like someone else is the problem and not me.
If you want to join me on this early lenten journey of prayer, fasting, and almsgiving I will be starting on Wednesday, August 29, the Feast of the Passion of the St. John the Baptist. I’m waiting until August 29 to give myself time to discern what exactly my prayer, fasting, and almsgiving will be and because I’m looking to St. John the Baptist as a patron, remembering his famous phrase “I must decrease so that He [Jesus Christ] can increase.” (John 3:30) This period of prayer, fasting, and almsgiving will end on November 1, the Solemnity of All Saints. It’s longer than 40 days; but, it’s for a worthy cause. We need a Church striving for holiness, accountability, unity, and above all love, who is God. (1 John 4:8)